And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
Randomize
