i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
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If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
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So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
I'm just that drunk tells people I love them or wants to set them on fire. Accept that.
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
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