think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
I woke up because I was nodding to the dream question of "would you like a sombrero?"
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
You texted me "Americans are sad" and "chicken coop disaster" without any further explanation.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
Randomize
