lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
Just rolled over and realized my vodka goggles are not as functional as my beer goggles
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
I woke up this morning to find myself laying in a beer puddle with "I'm sorry" written on the shaft of my dick and Nicole was nowhere to be found. Gotta love her
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Randomize
