okay pat passed out under dana's car
Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
I just recycled a years worth of liquor bottles. I can feel my alcoholic carbon footprint shrinking
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
I'm training him to sit when I whistle the tune from the hunger games. I'm going to be the coolest parent ever.
I don't get hangovers. Except once. And there is a massively epic story behind that, involving so much alcohol I should have died, and 13 raw hotdogs.
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
Randomize
