So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
She punched me in the face after i pulled it out and grabbed my cell phone. Ill be the one hiding in the bushes with one shoe.
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
I'm seriously gonna die surrounded by a million cats and an unbroken hymen
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
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