I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
You owe me a new pair of headphones. You plugged mine into the top of a mustard bottle.
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
Grilled cheese and whiskey for lunch is why i should NEVER be a housewife.
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
I've found my soulmate with the cardboard Dos Equis man.
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
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