Grow some girl-balls and come out already
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
So my mom wants to hear about my weekend. How do I make licking cupcake frosting off your face while high not sound like just that?
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
You know what sucks about being drunk at 4 pm? Not a god damn thing.
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
Randomize
