this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
If there is ever a next time, care about me enough to lube it up no matter what my drunk ass says
I just watered my plants with apple juice. Look what you made me do.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
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