So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
An old biker dude just flirted with me at Food City. I enjoyed it. God damn I need to get laid.
Yesterday I went home with one shoe, today I go home with three. Fucking win.
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
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