is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
So in hindsight, going through the McDonald's drive thru plastered at 4 a.m. on stolen bikes was a bad idea.
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
Randomize
