The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
So I used to make fun of texas a lot, then I got here and I found a place where I could get my tequila in a to go cup with a straw and I realized that this is the only place I ever want to be
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
Randomize
