You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
advice for life: when the cop takes your tallboy, don't ask for your coozy back
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
I swear I get as excited about the sound of a condom wrapper as my cat gets when she's getting a can of food.
Where am I? And why the fuck did you leave me here?
Relax. I left you somewhere safe plus you have all my weed so you know I will come back for you.
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
Randomize
