Wow so 15 missed calls, a vm AND a text saying come downstairs? ...And where is downstairs? Explain.
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
Who cheats on Christmas eve? It's just asking for Jesus to hate you
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
how do you politely tell someone their toddler looks alarmingly similar to the berries and cream guy
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
Randomize
