tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
I had to physically pry the rocks out of your hands so you wouldn't throw them at the guy with the cowboy hat. You probably would've missed anyways.
Just had an oven catch fire while I was balls deep. Fire department came, I did not.
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
Randomize