jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
not my fault. i got her to believe he wrote an oasis song. he still managed to find a way to make sure no girl ever gets near his penis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
You know what's awkward? Being with your girlfriend and seeing her ex-boyfriend that she left for you while you've got a Ron Burgundy level awkward boner.
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
Randomize