dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
Somehow i instagrammed my acceptance letter while blacked out. Then my grandma was the first to comment on it. I got over 50 likes....Phd here I come....
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
