Just promise me you won't ring in the new decade by clutching onto a toilet
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
i'm too drunk to leave my room. poked my head out like a turtle and everyone knew i wasn't sober. i like it better in my nonjudgmental turtle shell anyway.
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
i don't think fitbit tracks "flipping the fuck out" as activity.
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
Randomize