Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
I was taking a bath while he walked in, sat down on the toilet, and said "its like a baby, I can see it crowning."
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
Randomize
