I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
This morning I got out of bed 4 HOURS LATE, made eggs with a plastic beach shovel, and then ate them using pens like chopsticks in my bed with my turtle. Obviously, I am not in the mood to be proactive with my life today...
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
You peed on a flamingo?!?
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
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