I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
He tried to kiss me in the middle of hooking up... it was a deal breaker. I got off him and left.
So making out with chicks at the bar is fine and dandy, but your booty call can't kiss you? You have the strangest fucking rules...
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
Randomize
