Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
Bloody Mary Monday just took a turn for the worst... Just had a heart to heart talk with the cat about it's obsession with chewing on cardboard.... Time for a nap.
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
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