Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
There was a guy on the elevator dressed as santa in flip-flops giving away beer.
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
my god I love twenty year old dicks
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
I’m also apparently a very socialist drunk now
Instead of a horny one. All I want to fuck is capitalism these days.
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
Randomize
