Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(817): View more from Texas

I woke up this morning and I couldn't find my coffeetable. wtf?

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(817): I woke up this morning and I couldn't find my coffeetable. wtf? http://tfl.nu/ht45

Replies (15) Good night (4205) Bad night (1094)
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(520): View more from Arizona

Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.

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(520): Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out. http://tfl.nu/rjf8

Replies (18) Good night (2982) Bad night (1123)
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(514): View more from Quebec

in hindsight, drinking 2 bottles of wine probably wasnt going to put me in an optimal position for a job interview

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(514): in hindsight, drinking 2 bottles of wine probably wasnt going to put me in an optimal position for a job interview http://tfl.nu/us78

Replies (19) Good night (1076) Bad night (3619)
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(978): View more from Massachusetts

benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.

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(978): benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are. http://tfl.nu/ifpr

Replies (4) Good night (5027) Bad night (693)
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(615): View more from Tennessee

i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.

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(615): i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card. http://tfl.nu/6ciy

Replies (40) Good night (9828) Bad night (1275)
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(817): View more from Texas

this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real

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(817): this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real http://tfl.nu/fl2e

Replies (63) Good night (6368) Bad night (1000)
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(847): View more from Illinois

You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.

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(847): You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive. http://tfl.nu/z8kz

Replies (19) Good night (7298) Bad night (1369)
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(404): View more from Georgia

Are you still at the party or did I leave?

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(404): Are you still at the party or did I leave? http://tfl.nu/pph4

Replies (18) Good night (7097) Bad night (1132)
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(615): View more from Tennessee

You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs

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(615): You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs http://tfl.nu/j07e

Replies (1) Good night (1531) Bad night (579)
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(908): View more from New Jersey

I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates

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(908): I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates http://tfl.nu/99aw

Replies (1) Good night (1036) Bad night (354)
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(440): View more from Ohio

My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels

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(440): My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels http://tfl.nu/oz5l

Replies (11) Good night (521) Bad night (584)
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(719): View more from Colorado

I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda

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(719): I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda http://tfl.nu/ejn7

Replies (1) Good night (596) Bad night (325)
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(859): View more from Kentucky

Why do guys insist on chatting me up this early in the morning? I'm just like "Dude, I look like the bastard child of Einstein and a troll doll. Let me eat my Hot Pocket in peace."

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(859): Why do guys insist on chatting me up this early in the morning? I'm just like "Dude, I look like the bastard child of Einstein and a troll doll. Let me eat my Hot Pocket in peace." http://tfl.nu/re9p

Replies (1) Good night (851) Bad night (344)
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(317): View more from Indiana

I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given

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(317): I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given http://tfl.nu/n5qa

Replies (2) Good night (753) Bad night (468)
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(651): View more from Minnesota

Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?

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(651): Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober? http://tfl.nu/u9br

Replies (0) Good night (274) Bad night (358)

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