i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
So... My dad just saw the Plan B package and the beer cans in my backseat.
Oh its cool I'm sure he already knows you're a whore and an alcoholic.
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
Literally been in their house 5 minutes and I've projectile vomited all over the bathroom wall. The dog licked it up though so I think it's cool.
Randomize
