Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
I drank half a bottle of wine while watching the Olympics opening ceremonies. I catcalled at handsome athletes. Stop me.
There is pretty much a target on everyone's lips when I am drunk. EVERYONE
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
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