Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
He asked if I wanted to blow his flute? Please call me and pretend there is a family emergency!!!
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
there's chocolate cake in my bathtub.. I don't even want to know how the hell chocolate cake wound up in my tub..
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
So we just accidentally broke into a building from the third floor while carrying shovels. The security guards are still very confused
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
Randomize
