ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
I think I sprained my soul last night
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
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