So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
Listen: if you or anyone else at work finds a starfish in a bowl, just leave it. It'll be gone by next week.
Better yet, if you find it can you put it in the mini-fridge in your office for safe keeping? Spanks.
And if it's going to get me in trouble, maybe just don't mention that I know anything about it.
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
The chick I hooked up with last night is my girlfriend older sister. Who is in town visiting. Who I just met. Who I just had dinner With. Who is here along with their parents and the whole family. How did my luck get so bad?
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
Randomize