We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
There are huge fuckin pieces of palm tree in the road. what a road hazard. as i sit here and text you as i swerve to miss them
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
It gave me the St Patrick's Day nickname Slutty McShitfaced. I've never felt so understood.
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
Randomize
