Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
I had a dream I hooked up with Post Malone. I can still smell the dream
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
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