First thing she said after sex was.. are you baptised by chance?
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If a cougar buys you pizza and wants to show you her newly-won house, you have sex with her. It's the law. Just being all the man I can be dude
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
Randomize