she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
Because I'm a hot mess throwing up in the litter box
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
Randomize
