dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
If you hear screaming in the middle of the night, bat got loose. Call poison control immediately and explain rabies
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
I'm bleeding and have questions
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
Randomize
