I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
I'm sorry I kept calling last night when you wouldn't pick up. I'm REALLY sorry I sang "You Oughta Know" on more than 4 voice mails.
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
I woke up spooning my guard tube. Tell me I'm not the most dedicated lifeguard ever
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
Best case scenario: sex with hot bartender \nWorst case scenario: no sex and punched by tattooed guy that may or may not be said bartenders boyfriend.
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
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