Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
I have an explanation for how we got this drunk this fast... but you wont like it. We are officially in complete liver failure.
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
Me either. I want to get 'chase a stray cat through the neighborhood in my hooker heels' drunk. And it's your birthday, so you have to get 'best friend holding your hair while you puke in the bar bathroom and cry about your life' drunk. In a feather boa.
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
We moved the bed and she found my vibrator. The entire ride home was a montage of her singing "Are You Lonesome Tonight"
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