I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
I was dreaming of a parallel reality and in the dream I just looked up at my present self and was like "you're high, man"
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
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