I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
Randomize
