I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
My balls are so social today.
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
I felt kinda awkward walking into his house in nothing but lingerie and my dead grandmas overcoat
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
Randomize
