I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
Judging by my dry clothes and wet sheets, I think I might have gotten out of bed, pissed ON it, covered it up, and passed out on top of it
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
Correction: Jimmy johns. The one pita pit employee has been an asshole to me ever since you locked them out of the store
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
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