i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
two of my INSANE ex girlfriends just texted me saying their coming over because im home alone. needless to say, im deleting my twitter.
as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Guess which guy you've blown just made me sandwich at subway?
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
The fact that you think I have a life is so flattering to me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
Trouble in the neighborhood - turns out my brother's summer lawn care gig also entailed banging three different MILFs and they just all found out about each other
Gotta pay for college somehow...
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