You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
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She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
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He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
mike is out of commission and cannot make breakfast. he's sitting with two frozen waffles on his face & smiling like an idiot.
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
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