Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
Apparently my type is "guy whose parents had unprotected sex on Halloween". Last week was my ex's, my FWB's, and the guy I'm seeing's birthdays.
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
Randomize
