what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
i just made my gag reflex go away.
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
Randomize
