Woke up with a migrane, threw up blood, then my headache went away. I'm going to convince myself that it was just a bad batch of blood so I can drink again tonight
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
I literally just wiped coffee off of the corner of my mouth with my boob because my hands were full. Thought youd be proud. Good morning!
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
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