Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
lady crackhead wearing pjs and a santa hat brushed the snow off my car at 7am saying "free of charge" the whole time
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
I just want to say that I've always loved you and you are my best friend ever
You gave that creepy guy my number, didn't you? You really need to learn how to just say no, not interested.
Someone just said “I need to use up this money before I’m tits up under the dirt” so I think I’m going to start using that in my daily vocabulary.
I apparently sent an offer letter to, and then subsequently onboarded, the wrong candidate. How's your Monday?
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