We should be called the Road Head Warriors
bras are like tupperware for tits, keeps em fresh.
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
Hey had an urgent voicemail from the Illinois national guard....have you been using my identity for your blackout weekend?
Yes and yes
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
Apparently when it was last call I jumped up on the bar and told everyone to get the fuck out, which was immediately followed by a round of applause from the bouncers/bartenders and my tab getting paid as well.
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
Randomize
