Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
Yeah, I only wore tennis shoes under the gown. Way cooler than khakis and a shirt, but much more awkward when my parents wanted to go to dinner immediately after the ceremony and my grandmother started to unzip the gown. Stopped her before it was too late, but barely. My dad just rolled his eyes.
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
at one point, you reached into your purse, pulled out a tampon, and proceeded to rub it on your lips like chapstick... that drunk
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
Randomize
