i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
I cant find my shoes, my wallet, or my keys, but i know where your sister is.
I only kidnapped one of them. chill
i just remebered what i did last night, i asked a homeless man on a bike "hey whatcha doin with that bike, wanna make 5 bucks?" he agreed and then rode me on his handle bars a block away to the next bar.
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
Just for future reference, me asking if you're free, followed by a winking face is not my way of suggesting a tandem bike ride.
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
Randomize
