Dual....:-)
I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
An hour ago, you were stranded out of state, and now you're getting laid? You are a god. Whatever you do, don't ask her name.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
Ways to ruin a one night stand: the guy finds your parenting magazine on your dorm room desk.
You also spilled beer on my dog and tried to wipe it off with a paper towel but he kept getting away from you.
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
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