Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
There's a 35% chance I'm still residually drunk from last night.
And you say you're not good with numbers...
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
Randomize
